Shut out of Boston?

As I'm sure you have heard, entry to the 2011 Boston Marathon filled to capacity in just 8 hours!

Why is Boston so popular? Does it have a scenic course? Bargain pricing? Fast times? Convenient location?.


NO.

It's because it is exclusive. They don't let just anyone in, you have to qualify. Either by running fast times or spending/raising thousands of dollars for a charity slot.

Did you spend years training and running pedestrian marathons to get your qualifying time, only to be shut out of Boston for 2011?

Well, we at Tigram have good news for you!

Announcing
The 214th running of

The Tigram® Triangle Marathon.

It is a common misconception that Boston is the oldest and most exclusive marathon in the world.

Not true!

The Tigram® Triangle Marathon(TTM) dates back to 1796, much older than Boston.
And the TTM is also far more exclusive! How exclusive? Well, have you every heard of it? No?
Exactly.

Qualifying Times
For most of it's storied history, the TTM has set a lofty qualifying time of 2:00:59, for men and women of all ages. Absolutely no one has been good enough to qualify for this prestigious event.

However, because of the unexpected fill up of Boston, we at Tigram are making an unprecedented exception in order to accommodate the many thousands of disappointed Boston hopefuls.

For 2011, the qualifying times for the TTM have been adjusted to match those for Boston.
So here is your chance to run THE single most exclusive marathon in the world!

Course
 To those "in the know" the TTM route is legendary. A rolling course which culminates in the fabled "Resentment Ridge" at mile 21.

Crowd support makes the TTM journey unforgettable. Especially at mile 13, where the girls of Wesley's College of Sensual Massage and Exotic Dancing are cheering from the sidelines. Be sure to stop and get a kiss from one of the girls, and then a massage or maybe a lap dance. Remember to bring cash for a tip.

Entry Fee
In keeping with the exclusivity of the race, we put the entry fee at a premium level.

Standard: $900
VIP:        $3000

The VIP entry will make you feel extra special because you are paying much, much more.

Time and Location
The TTM is held near Raleigh, NC. We do not release the exact location and start time to the general public. This is to prevent any "unqualified" runners showing up and ruining your experience.

Charity Entries
For those that are not speedy, but are still dying to run this coveted race, we are offering charity slots.
The official charity of the 2011 TTM will be The Rake-A-Leaf Fund, which benefits middle-aged white men who are overburdened with tedious yard maintenance. A minimum donation of $10000 will be required.

Registration
Registration is invite only.
Capacity is capped at 5 runners, though we will be accepting non-refundable entries for up to 100,000 wait-list applicants.
Leave a comment if you feel you have what it takes to run the best marathon in the world.
If you are deemed worthy, you will receive a special invite.

Don't delay! The registration is expected to fill in minutes!